Rage against someone with out meeting them? I’m very close to it...

Well, as I learn about what happened over at my boyfriends place. It just continues to fill me with disgust and rage; it sickens me to think that someone would actually have the nerve to judge me without even meeting me. I MEAN COME THE FU*K ON! IF SOMEONE IS GOING TO BE THAT IGNORANT AND CLOSED THEY DO NOT EVEN DESERVE MY TIME! If one is going to make accusations against me, at least HAVE YOUR FACT STRIGHT! If someone has that much distaste for me, at least talk to me so I can see what your disagreement with me is!

I’m sorry but I am just so pissed off at myself for not being able to be there for him when he needs it the most. All I can do is just sit here 1200+ miles away, pushing little keys to tell him how I cannot help him at the moment. IT DRIVES ME INSANE! I am almost to the point where I will go over there and get him myself on my own two feet. I would not care how long it would take me; I would get there eventually and just take him back along with me. Just right now I am filled with so many emotions at once it is hard what to think right now, I feel helpless because I can’t help the person I love so dearly, I feel angry because of what other people think of me, and I feel an intense love for him. He is just so close, yet so far. It drives me to the brink of insanity.

I do know that he can hold on for a little longer, at least until spring break. Even though I am not there personally to experience what he is going through, I feel it in a different way. Whenever something bad goes on over at his place 1200 miles away, I feel a strange feeling on the back of my neck and I get all depressed. That is basically what I am feeling now, I know something is happening over there, but there is no way for me to tell what is going on. It is impossible for me not to care about him, and what is going on. Not when he is the thing I treasure most in life, not when he is the very soul that drives me on, not when he is the one and only person that I long to be with until my dying day.